"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 51

Our lives are made up of all the many memories that have formed who we are; the good, the bad and the ugly.

Memories are the built in diary we carry within us.  The thing is, we tend to focus on the negative memories over the good ones.  

A persistent recall of negative memories are a defense mechanism but can also lead to depression and anxiety.  Research has shown that if the positive aspects of a negative memory are focused on rather than the negative experience itself, than the focus can be shifted to a more positive one;

that's something to think about. 

Growing memories are the process of developing and changing the memories we have over time.  Memories are a complex cognitive ability that is important for learning, thinking and developing a sense of self.  Everyone has lifetime memories that consist of things like the birth of a baby, a wedding day,

graduating from college, experiencing a beautiful sunset with someone you love or a significant accomplishment that brought you immense pride.  If they were all put together it would be like a motion picture of your life.  These type memories are often brought back to your conscious mind.  They are usually wonderfully happy memories and therefore are tied to strong emotions such as joy, love, excitement or even sadness sometimes,  making them particularly vivid and lasting.  Major life events create very powerful lifetime memories.  Memories that involve deep connections to others tend to stay with us the longest.  The best moments of our lives will guide us to a better more enjoyable world.

There are those memories we have stored away though that are anything but enjoyable or happy ones.  Children who experience trauma are the ones who experience severe damage in their formative years.  When the traumatized child reaches adulthood, the tramatic events could have a lasting negative effect on their health and well being;  those negative memories are remembered as an adult.  The child that has been abused, neglected or exposed to traumatic events, has a much higher chance of having rather severe health issues as an adult; alcoholism, depression, smoking, eating disorders, high risk sexual behaviors and certain chronic diseases to name a few.  The promotion of proper care for the most vulnerable, our children, will give them a chance for a happy, healthy and productive life.  For all those who have dealt with negative childhood memories; you need to show  yourself kindness and compassion.  We need to try and step away from the memory, and acknowledge our emotions in regard to it.  Try your best to keep yourself aware of the present moment and live in it as much as possible. Bringing a therapist onboard can also help with other coping strategies.  For those who keep replaying their past negative memories, some have had good results by reenacting the childhood memory and replacing it with a positive outcome.   Every time you remember a negative memory, you are strengthening the neural pathway and the memory will live on.  By not intentionally recalling a bad memory, however, the neural pathway weakens and you will eventually start to forget.

Keep loving yourself no matter what. You have to hold love for yourself within your heart before love for anyone else can grow and thrive.  Be patient with yourself.  Reprogramming your negative memories takes time.

Please remember, you have always been worthy of being treated well, whether an adult or child.  I have found that relaxation techniques help me cope with bad memories.  It is important to try to avoid things that trigger your past negative memories.  Following is a great trauma prayer I found:

Trauma Prayer

Lord, In the midst of my trauma and pain, I seek your healing.

You know the depth of my wounds and weight of my burdens.  I ask that you bring comfort to my heart and peace to my mind.  Mend my brokenness and guide me towards a path of restoration.

Give me the strength to lean upon your promises.  Give me the courage to embrace the journey towards healing.  I trust in your unwavering love as the ultimate source of hope and renewal.

Amen

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 50

I will talk about the differences between spirituality and religion.  They are related, but are two different concepts.  Spiritualty is personal and flexable while religion is more organized.  The focus of spirituality is a personal connection to the Divine.  Religion on the other hand is  more organized and ritualistic.

Spirituality can be expressed in many different ways, where as religion is embedded in institutions.  Beliefs within spirituality are inclusive and embrace many pathways to the truth.  Religion most of the time is exclusive; people of different belief systems are excluded.  A spiritual person values direct experiences such as meditation. For a religious person, attending worship services is what holds great meaning for them. Personal growth and connection to what is sacred is the goal for a person who is spiritual.  For the religious, there are wider goals including physical, social and psychological.  Spirituality can be a vital part of traditional religious life, however, it can also

be expressed in nontraditional ways.  

I am very spiritual, but not so much religious.  As I posted previously, an organized church service is really not for me.  This is something that is left to the individuals' preferences.  Spirituality is about seeking your own unique path to the truth.  Having an awakening spiritually is often described as a profound realization or shift in your consciousness.  It can manifest in many different ways; such as a sense of clarity, a deep understanding of your purpose or a feeling of unity with all existence.  A spiritual awakening

can be spontaneous or brought about after prolonged spiritual practices.  It often leads to a change in perspective or lifestyle.  How does spirituality affect your mental health?  It can offer a sense of purpose, provide comfort in times of stress and grief and create a sense of belonging.  It is important to approach spirituality in a way that is healthy and supportive of your mental health.  It is only one component in your approach to your well being. Spirituality can be explored in many ways; through structured study or religious text, personal experiences and intuition and also through guided meditation or retreats.

When facing any challenges, connect with nature or a higher power for guidance.  You can engage in calming techniques as well.

Religion is a range of social cultural systems including designated behaviors, practices, morals and beliefs as well as texts, worldviews and organizations.  They relate humanity to supernatural, transcendental and spiritual elements.  Religious practices include rituals, sermons, commemoration of deities or saints, meditation, prayer, music and dance.  The study of religion is comprised of a wide variety of academic disciplines. 

Every individual will know in their heart what feels right to them.  Atleast that is how it was for me. Spirituality and religion can certainly intersect and both can be important resources for your well being. 

There are alot of people out there, however, who feel spirituality is not a good practice....nothing could be further from the truth.   If your heart tells you it is right for you, it will be.  On the other hand, if a more organized dicipline is what you need, you will feel it.  

Just because I am more spiritual, does not mean I am lacking morals.  I have been in church all my life and it was not until I began my spiritual journey, that I found I was called towards the path of spiritual enlightenment.  Contrary to the way some believe,  you DO NOT have to be inside a church building to receive your salvation.  You would be shocked to know how many believe that is so.  I can promise you that if it had been left up to me to walk the isle at church, my salvation would have never been received.

My Heavenly Father met me all the way; not half way. That's the truth. I was at home alone. Please understand, if you think you have to prepare yourself and be perfect before giving your life to God...you do not.  He wants you to come as you are.    It is just a matter of believing and simply asking Him to come into your heart.

Now__

Here are your most enlightening facts about religion versus

spirituality- 

__Religion__

Worships God

God is outside of you

Separates people with different beliefs

Teaches people to be fearful of God

Based on fear and restriction

Based on other's experiences

Led by people

__Spirituality__

Encourages oneness with God

God is within you

Unites people regardless of beliefs

Based on love and freedom

Based on your own personal experience

Led by your soul

May each of you find your heart's peace and fulfillment.

I love you all,

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 49

Spiritual journaling is a very therapeutic practice.  In involves writing down your thoughts, feelings and experiences.  It is a very good way to connect with yourself and express your creativity.  To start journaling, start small.  Do not pressure yourself into writing about a certain subject or writing alot.  You can maybe write a little about something that has inspired you, or what you are thankful for.  Looking over what you've written can keep you motivated and focused.

A wonderful idea would be to start a gratitude journal. Pen what blessings you are thankful for in your life.  You could set your intentions for what you want to accomplish during the day.  Affirmation journals can help you build both your spiritual growth as well as personal growth.  

Other than meditation, journaling is my way of connecting with my inner self.  I write down my ambitions, dreams and things in regard to my shadow self.  Everyone has a dark side to their personality.

Your shadow self are the parts of yourself you will need to work on as you grow spiritually; and are usually the things you would rather keep hidden.  Although it will be unclear where to start, there are different journaling ideas which can be very beneficial to you.  One thing for certain is that journaling can bring you into communion with God.  It helps you express your deepest thoughts and feelings.  It will connect you with the healing presence of the divine.  

Your mental health will benefit greatly from regularly writing down things you are experiencing.  It is a great emotional outlet.  By having a safe space to vent your frustrations or celebrate your joys, it is a stress reliever. It will keep anxiety in check.  Journaling helps gain insights and zone in on behavioral patterns and emotional triggers; something crucial for personal growth and mental well being. The practice of journaling will self examine your heart, meditate in your walk with Christ, record your entire spiritual journey and provide witness to future generations.  

Following are a list of self-knowledge prompts for you.

They will give you some things to ponder.

One thing I know I need to work on is__

I'm most proud that I__

The thing I am most thankful for is__

The thing I thought about the most as a child was__

The thing I am most afraid to tell people is__

The ways I have grown over the last 5 years are__

In the next year, I really want to__

One thing I'll never regret is__

One can really learn alot about themselves as they delve into these type questions.

I will end with some light prayer thoughts:

Dear God,

Enlighten what is dark in me.

Strengthen what is weak in me.

Mend what is broken in me.

Bind what is bruised in me.

Heal what is sick in me.

And lastly,

Revive the peace and love that has died in me...

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 48

The process of the spiritual awakening can be different for everyone.  The process will unfold in Divine timing and take longer for some people than it will for others.  You will come to an undertanding or awareness  that there is more to who you are than you think.  Many people struggle when they answer the call later in life.  Spiritual awakening is always available to you but because of an individual's life circumstances the timing of your journey may not come about as soon as someone else's would.   There are many stages to an awakening but not everyone will experience all of them.  For many, the first stage will arise from a profound discontent of the way your life is going.  There is an intuitive knowing that simply making a living is not truly the essence of being alive.  This feeling will become more pronounced over time. This  feeling of separation from God is a catalyst for the beginning of your spiritual journey. The homesickness will finally be recognized as a sacred calling;

A call to return to your true nature.  As your hunger for truth grows, you will experience a deep questioning of your personal reality and belief systems.  This phase is about  turning your assumptions, consciousness and naratives  about the universe inside out.  This shakeup of your mental and cultural constructs can be both liberating and unsettling.  This process can be very difficult because it challenges the very foundation you have built your understanding of life on.  Next, there will be a great curiosity and you will start to seek more knowledge; knowledge about different faiths, philosophies and

teachings.  In your search for spiritual enlightenment, you will explore different paths, each offering a different perspective on reality.   You will have a burning desire to unravel the mysteries of existence and obtain a deeper sense of purpose.  Discovering new knowledge and experiences holds so much excitement and passion.  For many the need will arise for a spiritual mentor.  The truest teacher, however, will guide you back to your inner self.  As you learn,  you will know to go directly to the source of your own being.  As your awareness broadens, then there will be a purging of all your old habits, relationships and possessions which no longer resonate with your true self; sometimes gracefully, but other times with great resistance.  It is like shedding an old layer of skin.  This stage is like setting sail on an infinite ocean voyage.  As your spiritual journey deepens, you cultivate a deep sense of surrender.  Through meditation practices you learn to let go of controling every aspect of your life and embrace the present moment with acceptance.  As you do surrender to the present, you will experience a great sense of peace and contentment that would have previously eluded you.  Understanding that you are not your ego is a pivotal realization.  There will be an awareness beneath your egoic mind and in the spaces between your thoughts, you catch glimpses of your true nature.  This stage will take time for you to work through because along the way you will get drawn back into your old patterns.

As your conditioned beliefs dissolve, you will feel an indescribable bliss, love and sense of unity with all of existence. You will find profound reverence for the Earth, all beings and all creation.  You will receive the knowledge that you are not the body, emotions or an individual self, but at the core, you are pure consciousness and connected to everything. The very boundaries of self and reality will dissolve.  We are not separate selves at all.  This is the art of bringing the sacred into the mundane; walking between the worlds of wisdom and one of laundry and paying bills.

The final part of this awakening is integration; embracing the ordinary with sacred eyes.  Every moment becomes a chance to express the Divine.  Washing dishes or paying bills is no longer just a chore but an act of love and presence, a recognition of the flow of energy and resources...

All living things are connected__

Everything.  We are all of one consciousness.

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 47

Every one has experienced fear at some time during their life.  Fear is a natural emotion.  It protects us from danger, however, if it becomes excessive or interfears with your daily life, it can be debilitating.  Understanding the reason for your fear would be the first step in making things better;  what were the circumstances that led to that fear.  Acknowledge that is a normal thing to feel afraid.  It is important not to suppress your fear.  Do the opposite and try and expose yourself to manageable doses of whatever you fear; becoming more comfortable over a period of time.  Challenge any negative thoughts you have in regard to what you are fearful of, replacing them with a more positive perspective.  Calm yourself with breathing exercises or meditation practices.  I will say this, if this fear you have is very severe, seek out a therapist or counselor to help you.  They can give you evidence based strategies that could be very helpful.  Focus on developing a coping mechanism, building resilience and visualizing yourself being successful at overcoming your fear.  Conquering fear does take time.  Be patient with yourself and celebrate your achievements; rewarding yourself for small steps of  progress.  

Fears that can limit a person the most are those that are buried in the deepest part of your subconscious. They are emotional fears; being much more abstract than any physical threat you may face.  The most common of those being the fear of failure, not being good enough or the fear of intimacy.  Fear is often connected to core beliefs developed in the past.  They may have protected you from a perceived threat at the time but are now limiting your potential.  They can induce the fight or flight mode without being in any real danger.  Holding on to your 

emotional fears does not protect you from danger, but makes you sense danger where there is none.   

A prolonged activation of the fight or flight mode can cause stress, anxiety and even health problems.  It can also lead to impulsive behaviors.  When in a situation where your immune system is suppressed, it  makes the body more susceptable to infections which is certainly not a good thing.  If you are feeling overwhelmed or stressed, it is very important to find healthy ways to cope with your emotions.

Our Heavenly Father is aware His people will become fearful in life and gives us a scripture to calm our hearts.

Isaiah 41:10 says

Fear not, for I am with thee.

Be not dismayed, for I am thy God.  I will strengthen thee and help thee.  I will uphold thee with my righteous right hand.

He is reminding us that in times of fear, we are never alone.  He is always with us, lifting us up; strengthening us against our fears.

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 46

You are not your name; you are not your body.  You chose to  incarnate on the earth to learn and live your heart's desire.

You are an energetic being of pure light having a temporary experience. 

Being on a spiritual path means getting to know all the parts of yourself; the light and the dark.

It's a deep dive into your soul. 

It is being raw and vulnerable. 

It is having respect for yourself and all living beings. You will be working to heal your ego and your learned behaviors; the wounds to your soul you have endured throughout your life.  There are several types of wounds a soul may have  acquired: abandonment, guilt, trust and neglect.  Abandonment includes codependency,  feeling left out or fear of  being left.  Guilt wounds would include not liking to ask for things, using guilt to manipulate others and being afraid to set boundaries.  Trust wounds cause someone to be afraid of getting hurt, they do  not feel safe and have feelings of insecurity. Lastly, if you have a wounding of neglect, this will cause a person to get angry easily, have low self esteem and they will repress their emotions. You are going to feel uncomfortable at times. It is supposed to feel that way.  You are in the process of undoing years and years of programming and deep healing every part of your soul.  You may feel lonely because you may be waking up while everyone else around you is still sleeping.  It will be alright;  let them sleep.  Keep going and keep shining your light as the divine being you are.  It is not easy, but it is so worth it. 🌞

"OUT OF THE DARKNESS" POST 45

Being still in solitude is not easy, but necessary, as God prepares you for the next chapter of your life.  It is in the stillness that He speaks the loudest.  He is preparing you for what is to come.  All the less than perfect decisions you have made, well, you revisit them.  It is an inner healing process for your greater good.  He assures my heart that this is not a punishment,  but His healing preparation for my soul's purpose.  My life will look  different within a matter of just a few months.  In this quiet stillness, my faith is being tested.  As I look back to how I used to be and the bad decisions I have made in the past, I feel it is time to come clean on my most difficult admission of guilt.

Money issues will cause you to do unthinkable things; things that you would NEVER do under normal circumstances.

My father had left my mother a nest egg that would insure she would be cared for when she needed it.  Me, coming out of a divorce, it was an easy fix to use the quick loan system as a way to survive my day to day.  Upon doing that over a period of time, I had once again backed myself into a corner financially.  Living in the house with my mother and taking care of her, she had gotten to the point of needing help paying her bills, so I had control of her finances. I saw a way out of my money issues and made a terrible decision that haunts me to this day.  I had no way of paying off the debt I had stacked up and decided none would be the wiser; how could that money ever be missed. 😔  On my estimation, I used probably ten thousand dollars of my mother's money to pay off my debt, maybe a little more. Why, I felt justified in doing it, I just do not know.   It was a quick decision to help me breathe, releasing me from the stress I found myself under.

My sister became aware of what had happened and approached me about it.  I was so embarrassed.  What person in their right mind would do such a thing. She had access to the bank statements as well as myself and of course when that kind of money disappears... 

A large part of healing is being able to speak your truth about things you've done in your life.

I have learned to speak my truth and it is for certain, the truth will set you free.